Skills to Resolve Conflict and Bring Peace to Our Homes and Communities

Our Natural Tendencies are Harmful

Furthermore, my professional experience as a psychologist, marriage counselor, business consultant, and executive coach tells me that many of our natural tendencies are harmful. They make things worse rather than better. Some people, when facing conflict, go into an aggressive and fight mode, others run emotionally and resort to silence or appeasement, and still others distract and avoid. Although our natural tendencies are intended to reduce the impact of conflict, they actually and make it worse in the long run.

Stepping up to Conflict

Therefore, learning to deal with conflict is one of the most important skills we can learn. I’ll be teaching you to deal with conflict by becoming aware and managing your internal reactions to conflict, building bridges of understanding and collaboration with others, and learning the skill of dialogue, a participative process of communication in which people listen to understand one another’s point of view and then agree upon options to solve problems and/or resolve their disagreements

The process of dialogue encourages deep listening to others, a willingness to share your own point of view and search for solutions that are good for all and not just a minority. Dialogue is talking openly including about sensitive subjects. The more openly we can talk, the better will be our solutions to conflict and the more unified and committed we’ll be to carry them out.

In fact, I’ll go so far as to say that the most successful people, in any walk of life, are good at handling conflict. They are willing to face conflict directly and are even willing to enter into difficult and sensitive conversations that others want to avoid. They can do this because they understand the dynamics of conflict and how to create trusting conditions that will open up communication and lead to positive, even amazing outcomes.

Here is what you’ll learn in this book:

• How to prevent a disagreement from becoming unhealthy conflict
• Four core communication styles and how they impact conflict
• Your personal readiness to use the skills required for resolving conflict
• The mindset, confidence, and personal skills to facilitate conflict resolution
• Awareness of harmful, collusive patterns of interactions and how to interrupt them
• Strategies for building bridges of collaboration and goodwill with others
• A framework and process for entering into difficult conversations and resolving conflict
• How to defuse conflict and turn it into a constructive conversation
• How to negotiate win/win outcomes

How We’ll Proceed

The book is organized into four sections. In section one, you’ll learn about the nature of conflict, the differences between conflict and disagreements, how conflict escalates and skills to build trust so that conflict does not get out of hand. Section two explores the strengths and weaknesses of four common styles of communication. You’ll identify your preferred style and see the consequences of each style on conflict. Section three is about preparing yourself for dialogue. I’m giving you tools to reshape your understanding of conflict as well as alter your own thoughts and feelings so you can enter conflict with awareness and confidence. And section four will describe the four phases (and specific steps) of conflict resolution. You’ll learn how to engage people in sensitive conversations in ways that make positive outcomes likely.

Finally, I want to say that the book is not abstract. I’ll be giving you lots of examples and case studies as well as exercises throughout so you can see the application and make the principles transferable to your life.

So let's get started by purchasing the book here.