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Key Moments

Empowering people to make strengthening choices

A Pattern of Personal Transformation-Part II

A Pattern of Personal Transformation-Part II

In my last post, I introduced the following pattern of personal transformation: Steps in Personal Transformation In a nutshell, here are the steps: Step One: Wake up (be fully present, alert and conscious of what is happening) Step Two: Take accountability (claim ownership rather than living from blame and excuses) Step Three: Interrupt old patterns […]

By rogerkallen


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Non-Defensive Listening in the Middle of Conflict

Non-Defensive Listening in the Middle of Conflict

Although our “key moments” are difficult to face and handle, they bless our lives because they are the means by which we grow. They give us an opportunity to interrupt old patterns and act from a new set of principles. Here’s an example from The Hero’s Choice. Think about Hal’s interaction with Kathy as he […]

By rogerkallen


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Get at the Root of Your Negative Behaviors

Get at the Root of Your Negative Behaviors

Most of us have grown up with beliefs that don’t serve us. We live in an imperfect world. We are nurtured by imperfect care-givers (some much worse than others). And, especially when children, it’s easy to misread cues in our environment and arrive at false conclusions about ourselves, life and relationships. Then we spend our […]

By rogerkallen


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How to Challenge Your Beliefs

How to Challenge Your Beliefs

I’ve been writing about the power of our beliefs these past few weeks. I want to continue this theme by introducing “The Belief Model” which illustrates how our beliefs determine our behavior and eventually our results. You’ll notice that the model is the key moment model only with a little different twist. It’s based on […]

By rogerkallen


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How to Become Emotionally Mature in a Relationship

How to Become Emotionally Mature in a Relationship

Hal hated Charlie, everything about him, from his knowing sneer to his rolling swagger. When he saw him enter the restaurant with Keith, he wished fervently he could get away and considered getting up and walking out of the breakfast meeting, without a word to either of his two former partners. But then he garnered his faculties and decided to accept this reality. He would choose how to respond, and his choice would be to be cordial and cooperative. He felt a surge of strength as he realized that handling himself in a dignified manner with both these men would be a bigger personal victory than if he met with Keith alone.

By rogerkallen


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Key Moment: An Example

Key Moment: An Example

In my last blog I presented the idea of a key moment. Now I’d like to bring the concept alive with an example from the workplace. Remember the definition. A key moment is a situation or event that presents a challenge and demands a response. How we respond to our key moments determines, to a […]

By rogerkallen


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Key Moments: Seizing The Opportunity In Life’s Dificulties

Key Moments: Seizing The Opportunity In Life’s Dificulties

We don’t need to look far to find adversity. Most lives are characterized by some degree of difficulty and struggling, whether minor (a flat tire on the way to work) or major (the death of a loved one). We begrudge our adversities, wishing they would go away. Yet they don’t. Life just keeps happening, one […]

By rogerkallen


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